Thursday, August 1, 2019

Alex Bernard Akomer

Jaredhill8: ←Created page with '== Background == Alex Bernard Akomer was a philanthropist and American businessman, born February 7th, 1937. His life began when he was birthed from the loins of...'


== Background ==
Alex Bernard Akomer was a philanthropist and American businessman, born February 7th, 1937. His life began when he was birthed from the loins of his African-slave father and his Nordic, peasant mother. His parents relationship was forbidden in his Nordic village, so being the product of their copious amounts of booty sex, the couple stuffed the oversized infant into a baby boat and floated him towards the place they knew he would be able to prosper. Alex grew to be 6 feet tall by the time he arrived in that tiny boat in Blue Ball Village, Maryland. By the time he reached the age of 14, Alex lead one of the largest underground crime organizations in America called "Bad Boys Get Spankings." Most famously known for his attempted, but failed, assassination of long-time best friend, Kim Jong Un, Alex had to go into hiding for nearly a decade. Akomer was awarded the medal of honor twice for his courage from both the Revolutionary war, where he held up a sign that said "Racism good", and World War II, where he trained donkeys to bite the scrotums off of Nazi leaders. After coming out of hiding, Akomer along with a generous investor by the name of Shorty Shitstain, created the largest strip club chain in the world called, "Titties Titties Let Me See". Taking the adult entertainment industry by storm, Akomer attributed the success of the business to the fact that they only hire transgender midget men.


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